Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Barbados, Monkeys and Moving....

So, my jumping back on the horse did not work exactly as planned. In my defense I ended up on a last minute trip to Barbados limiting my computer time and leaving me feeling inspired yet unable to log in, a tragedy, really, I swear. We swam, played in the water, fed fish and monkeys, pet turtles and in general just relaxed. My sister and I cleaned up at poker, her because she kept getting major cards on the River, me because I lucked out and called my brother on his many, many bluffs. But after a week of wonderful vacation time, reality came crashing down prior to leaving the adorable little island.

My family and I spent all day in the airport to have the powers that be FINALLY cancel the flight and a mere 24 hours later I made it home. While we waited I temporarily thought I had been transported to a psych hospital as one lady had a full on melt down complete with screaming as though the entire world was conspiring against her to keep her from getting back to the States. I would have felt a little bad about it but right before the announcement was made she had confessed she had missed her flight the day previous due to getting to the airport late, thereby her being stuck with us was more her own doing than anything else. After speeding through the maze of the Miami airport, breezing through customs after wisely avoiding the lady who chose to go into the US Passports only line when she clearly had a passport from another country (it was red not blue), and making it back through security and to my gate as they were boarding section 2. Bottom line, I made it home.

I was happy to be back in order to catch up with all the goings ons of my husband while I had been away. Within minutes of reuniting he got the phone call we have been waiting for. A job offer that does not require us moving clear across the country. Very exciting.

Being a girl, we are used to are varying emotions. My first emotion was excitement. A little sadness because while I didn't want to move across the country, I did love the idea of spending some quality time with the fam, but not sure that is worth uprooting our lives twice in two years. I quickly jumped on the Mammoth/Tahoe/Carson bandwagon and started thinking about all the things that needed to be done. Suddenly the move was reality, not just an abstract idea as it had been for the past few months. Within minutes I was in tears. Chris stood there looking utterly baffled. He was stressed about moving but experiencing so much relief from staying on the left coast that as far as he was concerned there was absolutely noting to be sad about. I, on the other hand, was experiencing the 'we are really doing this and I am leaving all my friends behind' moment.

I am a logical person. I know this response makes zero sense given the fact we will be a short drive or flight away versus living all the way in Tampa. I was going to leave the same people if I had to move there. Chris did his best to comfort me but could not shake the confusion. He went straight to the "solve the problem" mode, which entails asking such ludicrous questions such as "should we not move?" "do you want me to turn down the job?" and "why are you crying?" We made it quickly past the tears phase and into the acceptance phase. My rational head returned and I was able to see all the positives. The happy reasons this is all a great thing, including getting to ski all winter, hike, bike and camp again and most of all, with my new plan, save a little money for a year or so. That's a whole other conversation....

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